The Lesson That Took Me 30+ Years to Learn

Friday, July 29, 2011 9:00 AM

 
"Everyone is a genius. But if you judge a fish on its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid." -Albert Einstein

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Don't undervalue your gifts.
Believe that your opinion counts.
Trust yourself.
Don't be afraid to be different.
Express yourself in your own way.
Live your truth.

Decisions: Needs, Wants and Living Without Regret

Tuesday, July 26, 2011 9:00 AM



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What drives you more -- needs or wants? Are you more likely to make decisions based on what you think is best for you in the long run or what will satisfy you most in the moment?  The uncertainty of life requires that we find some kind of balance between these two concepts.

On the one hand, tomorrow is not promised and we don't want to constantly deny ourselves of things that bring us pleasure. On the other hand, living in a reality of complete indulgence and immediate gratification is chaotic at best, isn't it?

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I went through a period in my life where I was constantly in crisis. My decisions were all based on what I felt would make me feel best in the moment. During that time, I was insecure, impressionable, and disconnected from myself. I didn't admit it to myself at the time, but I now know that I didn't believe I had a future worth protecting. I didn't believe in myself and my faith was weak, so the decisions I made for my life reflected that.

I'm certainly not in that place anymore, but I can still see it clearly in my rearview. In many ways, I'm still paying for the choices I made back then.  I haven't gotten rid of the regret yet (perhaps I never will), but I dwell on it less and less.  What about you?  Are you a recovering chaos junkie like me?   Or maybe you've always played it safe and now you don't know how to indulge yourself.  Most of us can relate in some way to both of these extremes. 

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Have you ever thought about this concept of needs and wants and how your approach to it has shaped your life?  It's worth some self-reflection.  Whether we realize it or not, our tendency to lean towards one or the other often causes regret and dissatisfaction in our lives.  We wonder, what if I'd done things differently?  What if I'd been more responsible?  What if I'd married the wild one instead of the stable one?  What if I'd taken that job overseas?  What if I'd done the unthinkable instead of the expected?  What if I'd saved and planned for the future instead of living outside of my means? 

Really, we can drive ourselves crazy with the what if's.  Or, we can sit back and observe our decisions without judging them as right or wrong.  What we've done, what we haven't done -- it's just our path.  We don't always do or even know what's best for us.  Our hearts and minds disagree more often than not and yet they must coexist.  We always have the option to change the way we do things if it's not working so just keep doing the best you can to seek balance and leave the regrets behind.  


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Quotes for Reflection:

Good decisions come from experience, and experience comes from bad decisions. ~Author Unknown


When you have to make a choice and don't make it, that is in itself a choice. ~William James


Do not plant your dreams in the field of indecision, where nothing ever grows but the weeds of "what-if." ~Dodinsky, www.dodinsky.com





Love and Locks - Same Blog, New Stuff

Friday, July 22, 2011 7:46 PM

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While I've been away from the blog for awhile, I've been missing it and you readers terribly.  And yet, it was a necessary break. My job has been so intense for the last few months. I got a promotion (woo hoo!), started training someone new on my team, and changed client loads (again).  I had to really focus to keep everything in order -- which meant no blogging.  And at night, it was family time and then bed time. Slowly, I'm feeling like I'm ready to get back to writing and sharing here and I'm excited about it. :) 

While I was away, for a split second I thought that I would have to give up my blog in order to be successful in other areas of my life.  But then I quickly realized that's not an option.    "What we create becomes meaningful to us only once we stop creating it and start to think about why we did so."    Who knew I'd become so attached to my little "online journal" and who knew that there would ever be anyone other than my friends who would read it!  The thought of giving up WCD made me so sad; I knew it wasn't the right thing to do.  So, I'm back and I will continue to grow, develop and share here whenever and however I can.

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It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you are not. ~Author Unknown


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Writing is about discovery for me.  My life is not defined by what I do, but who I am.  And all that I AM becomes clear when I write. So, I need to stop thinking to myself  "Who am I to call myself a writer?"  I've become so much more confident and self-assured since I started blogging and sharing my take on life through the written word.  Being able to communicate and touch people through writing helps me to feel purposeful.  As a shy and awkward girl at heart, it makes me feel like maybe I don't mind being noticed.  It's much easier to create freely when you are simply in search of yourself and not trying to fit a standard.  I know I'm not the best writer in the world, but writing helps me to be the best ME that I can be and that right there is magical.

Furthermore, writing helps me to practice more honesty and love in my life.  And I can't get enough of that.  Many of you say you appreciate my honesty and transparency.  Well, there's more!  Sometimes I still hold back and worry about alienating people.  I won't be satisfied until I've learned to feel that fear and still push through it.  Sometimes growth is scary. Often, we don't even recognize growth for what it is right away. It can be just a small whisper that we barely hear that tells us to do something differently.  Well, I'm listening and I'm excited to hear what my heart has to say.  Don't be surprised if you notice some new things around here or even some old things done in different ways.  I'm taking life as it comes.  Are you?


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Can it be I stayed away too long??

Monday, July 11, 2011 3:18 PM

Celebrating 4th of July at the beach!

Hi friends! Did I leave your mind while I was gone? :) You certainly did not leave mine. I didn't expect to take such a long hiatus, but it's been necessary. I'm still not ready to get back to a consistent schedule; there's too much going on and I don't function well when I'm overwhelmed! But, I just had to stop in for a quickie. I really miss my happy place here. I hope that you all are not only enjoying the summer, but finding growth in it. There's always something to be grateful for, even in the midst of struggle.


There are three areas in which I've been particularly challenged lately: Patience, Diligence and Decisiveness. What are you working on this summer? Also, what strides have you made? And what's going on with your hair?!?!

If I haven't been by your blog in awhile or chatted with you on twitter, I'll be back soon! xoxo